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Showing posts from January, 2021

STRANGE LOVE.

I knew I had to make a choice and live with it. We had been talking about breaking up for the longest time but none of us thought it could happen so soon. I guess we wanted it to work so bad that we didnt think giving up was fair.  It doesn't make things easy that we were both going to the same college after high school. We would see each other with other people,  for me it was just too much to take in. Thabang was my first love,  we shared everything together and he knew me all of me. We had been dating since sixth grade,  we met at school. When we were in 10th grade we had sex for the first time. So he was the only guy I had been with.  Natasha can you please pass me the salt. My mom shouted, I didnt realize she has been calling me for the past few minutes. I was deep in my thoughts. Sorry , I passed the salt. My dad looked at me funny. Why are you so far from here wheres your head huh? My dad asked in a base. I'm here Dad.  My family was just me and my parents. I was the onl

MY INNOCENCE PART3.

 I couldn't believe what had happened.. here I was with the guy of my dreams.. having oral sex! We spoke about school and college , I was happy to know he was planning on going to the same college as I was. We were both waiting on our acceptance letters.  I had a great time with you, he kissed me softly, while kissing me I held his banana, it was hard.. I wanted to put it in my mouth but I said nothing. We went back to the car holding hands.. and there they were his friends. Giggling as they spotted us.  Ryan ! Tyler !! What the hell are you doing here?? We had to follow you to really see if you really completed your dare. Ryan said. The trees around us felt like they were choking me. I  was a task all along, my eyes became teary.  I stepped away from Sam.  Ryan what did you say,? You were just a dare , we dared him to date you for 3 days and sleep with you. Did you think he loved you? You're just a nerd. A fat nerd. What made you think you could date a guy like Sam? You're

MY INNOCENCE PART2.

Come on.. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable. Forgive me? Sam had that effect on me , I couldn't get angry even if I wanted to and this scared me for some reason.  Can I hug you? He asked looking down as if embarrassed of what he had done. Yes, you may. I mumbled. He hugged me from the back. This time I didn't feel his banana, may be he was really sorry... He waited for me downstairs to change. I was in my torn shorts and an oversized T-shirt with my hair down. Wow you look cute, I've never seen your hair down like this you should wear it like this at school.. it suits you. The rest of the afternoon we spent it sitting on the couch watching movies. I made sandwiches and we snacked with popcorns. I had a boyfriend, not just any boyfriend.. it was the hottest guy in school and he was here with me eating popcorns in my living area. His hand under my shirt the whole time playing with my nipple.  He was sure naughty. I thought. Kiss me before I leave

MY INNOCENCE.

 There I was sitting on my bed in the middle of the night. Thinking about what you were up to. Smilling from ear to ear alone , reminding myself of the afternoon we both had. You had told me you loved me and wanted to be with me. It was us holding hands , looking each other in the eyes at the back of the school where no one noticed, and you had told me not to tell anyone because public relationships end quickly. I believed him , I mean what did I know about relationships? And here I was reminiscing about that afternoon,  we kissed and he kissed my neck too. I just have one question for you why did you steal a banana at the schools kitchen? The whole time kissing I could feel it in your pockets.. I thought I'd ask you again tomorrow morning. I went to bed just after my banana thoughts. It was just me and my dad living together. Let's get a real quick cap of how I looked like.. I was short , chubby and had a cute face but I was a nerd. I wore glasses that made me look like a prof

YOU CHANGED ME.

 He was sweet and kind. I gave him my heart and he broke it into pieces. Well that's no the point. He lied too,  he played me like strings on a guitar. He left me to drown. Suffocating into this thing we call life. We used to be so good together. I know you're hoping for the part where I say I've moved on from him, the part where I tell you I don't love him anymore. Well that's not the point.  Everytime I try to convince myself that you're not the one for me something always reminds me of the memories we shared. If only I could remove the memories I have with you and maybe I could move on. You hurt me so much that my anger turned into hate. The problem is I can never hate you. You chose her over me. After all we been through. After all the things I did for you. You don't even realise how I treated you.  I was the girl who came to you and never wanted anything in return. I was the girl you looked at and smiled for no complete reason. I'm the girl you touc